Fourteenth in the 1K a Day Motivational Series, in which I talk about something that happened in the previous week that could have or did prevent me from writing a minimum of 1,000 words on a given day, or possibly talk about something that provided support to get me through the day.
Today it’s a familiar subject. We’ve all been there. We’ve all wanted to just say “Screw it. I just don’t want to bother today.” Maybe we don’t have anything specific in mind. Maybe it’s not video games or television or parties or working too hard or being tired or any of the other things I’ve talked about in these Motivational posts. Maybe you’re just sick and tired of anything that isn’t sitting around and goofing the fuck off.
That’s where I was for a couple days this past week. It’s not burn out. I’m not disinterested in the stories I’m working on (in fact I’m more enthused about Gridfall right now than I have been in a couple weeks, and I’ve been really enthused about it even then!). It’s not that I want to work on other stories, or read a book, or get drunk, or party, or go out to see a movie, or spend time with family, or anything at all.
I just want to not do it.
I think, “I’m gonna miss a day eventually. Why not today? Just take a break from it all. Give the people their schadenfreude, they deserve it, you selfish bastard.”
I don’t even know what to tell you about this day. I honestly can’t tell you how to motivate yourself when every single thing you think about doing seems pointless. I could get some sleep, but why bother. It’s National Fuck It Day and the only goal is to disappoint everyone, and everyone starts with me.
When I started feeling this way, I disengaged from the emotional turmoil. I didn’t know how to move beyond it, or around it, or how to power through it.
So I sat down and I wrote about it. Diary style, bitches! I needed to exorcise a demon and even though I don’t understand what that demon was, just writing out what I wanted to do and getting it out of my system, into the universe, got me past it. I slayed the bastard and it was good.
I still didn’t want to write on those days, but I worked it through. Will that work for you? If not writing it, maybe talk to someone you wouldn’t normally talk to. Do something out of the ordinary, no matter how mundane.
Kick yourself for being a lamewad. Motivate yourself by doing jumping jacks. Get yourself to stop thinking about the negative and the not wanting to do it. All I can say is stop whinging and get on with it, no matter how much you just want to sit there and wallow.
Maybe you have to do some karaoke. Or play some Guitar Hero. Or masturbate. Or have sex. Or go for a jog. Maybe you go work in a homeless shelter for a couple hours. Just get out and go do something.
Don’t let yourself be your defeat! Work it out, get your words in, and damnit, write the hell on, writers.